My son has fallen victim to a contagious disease rampant among schoolboys. It's called Pokemon, and one of the symptoms is that the sufferer CAN NOT STOP talking about Pokemon.
I decided yesterday to attempt a radical therapy, one that has no chance of curing the Pokemon obsession but that would, I hoped, mitigate the verbal onslaught. We were in the car, driving home from camp, and from the backseat my son kept up a steady monologue about Pokemon.
"...so you could have a fire type, or a psychic fire type! Which one would you want?"
"Actually, I don't want either. You know what? I'm really not that interested in Pokemon. [deep breath] You know what I am interested in? PROJECT RUNWAY. A new season is starting on TV this week and I'm so excited because it's been forever like MORE THAN A YEAR since the last season was on TV because the producers wanted to switch to a new channel and there were all these lawsuits but they're finally resolved and they filmed the new season a long time ago but they couldn't show it and the new season is starting on Thursday and it's gonna be awesome and on Thursday before the premiere there's going to be a special Project Runway All-Stars episode with a bunch of my favorite people from past seasons of Project Runway and I just CAN'T WAIT." [runs out of steam]
From the backseat, a moment of stunned silence.
"Hey, guy? Did you notice what just happened there? How I wouldn't stop talking about something you're not interested in, and it was really boring? That's how I feel, sometimes, when you talk about Pokemon."
Then for the rest of the evening and into this morning, we had conversations about subjects OTHER than Pokemon (or Project Runway), about matters such as the importance of frequently saving the files you're working on and whether putting too much jam on a sandwich qualifies as a mistake.
It's been pleasant, but I'm not going to delude myself into thinking that the Pokemon obsession is fading. For that matter, I know that my cable TV compulsion is only going to grow stronger in the weeks to come. You see, this week just might be the best week of cable reality programming EVER. On Wednesday, Bravo will air the finale of Top Chef Masters AND the season premiere of Top Chef. Then on Thursday, Lifetime will broadcast the aforementioned Project Runway premiere and the Project Runway All-Stars Special.
I have been working extra-hard on my ass in Pilates class, just to prepare it for all the gleeful couch-sitting to come.
The difference between being a child sufferer of Pokemon Obsession and being an adult stricken with Cablephelia is that as an adult, I can chose when and where to discuss my chosen subject matter. I am choosing to discuss it here, on my blog (though you'll likely also see my comments if you are a reader of Endless Simmer or Tom&Lorenzo.) So consider this fair warning: I intend to blog every episode of both Top Chef AND Project Runway.
If you're not interested in those shows, could I tempt you with a guest post about Chimchar and Pikachu?